In a Podiatrist's office: "Time wounds all heels."
On a Septic Tank Truck: Yesterday's Meals on Wheels
At an Optometrist's Office: "If you don't see what you're looking for, you've come to the right place."
On a Plumber's truck: "We repair what your husband fixed."
On another Plumber's truck: "Don't sleep with a drip. Call your plumber."
On a Church's Billboard: "7 days without God makes one weak."
At a Tyre Shop: "Invite us to your next blowout."
At a Towing company: "We don't charge an arm and a leg. We want tows."
On an Electrician's truck: "Let us remove your shorts."
In a Non-smoking Area: "If we see smoke, we will assume you are on fire and take appropriate action."
On a Taxidermist's window: "We really know our stuff."
On a Fence: "Salesmen welcome! Dog food is expensive!"
Outside a Muffler Shop: "No appointment necessary. We hear you coming."
In a Veterinarian's waiting room: "Be back in 5 minutes. Sit! Stay!"
In a Restaurant window: "Don't stand there and be hungry; come on in and get fed up."
In the front yard of a Funeral Home: "Drive carefully. We'll wait."
At a radiator shop: "Best place in town to take a leak."
Sign on the back of another Septic Tank Truck: "Caution - This Truck is full of Political Promises"
The worst day camping still beats the best day working