security guard

Heard anything funny today about our pollies (their always good for a laugh). Get in touch with that inner Irishman and let’s hear a joke or two.

security guard

Postby Titch » Sun Jul 25, 2010 11:54 am

The company president called the chief security guard into his office.

"Chuck, we've received a complaint from one of the employees that you are making obscene sexual comments and putting your hands where they don't belong. These unwanted advances will have to stop."

Chuck looked down at his feet and mumbled, "I'm sorry, Sir. I won't' do it again."

The company president said, "I'm sure Ms. Jones will be happy to hear that."

Chuck's face lit up. "Ms Jones?!!!! I was afraid that Bob in Accounting was complaining!!!!"
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Titch
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Re: security guard

Postby Titch » Thu Jul 29, 2010 9:04 pm

A little boy was lost at in the supermarket. He went up to the security guard and said "I've lost my dad." The security guard asked him "What's he like?" and the little boy replied "Beer, and women with big boobs."
Marriage Equals a life Sentence
Titch
Mr(or Mrs) Dribble
 
Posts: 1341
Joined: Sat Dec 06, 2008 3:19 pm
Location: South East of Melbourne

Re: security guard

Postby Titch » Thu Jul 29, 2010 9:05 pm

A man is sitting in the pub when he hears a bowl of peanuts on the bar saying "Oooh, you really are amazing. Oooh, you are lovely." Then the fruit machine shouted "Rubbish, look at the state of that haircut. And those socks don't go with those shoes." The barman apologised. "I'm sorry," he said, "The nuts are complimentary but the fruit machine is out of order."
Marriage Equals a life Sentence
Titch
Mr(or Mrs) Dribble
 
Posts: 1341
Joined: Sat Dec 06, 2008 3:19 pm
Location: South East of Melbourne


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